Step 11 -- Are you awake?

Step 11: Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

I heard this at our Moment of Silence Meeting…a meeting dedicated to Step 11.  Some of you may recognize our koan for November as Psalms 46:10.

Koan:  “Be still and know I am God.”

After I sent out the announcement this month, a friend wrote back, "A koan from the Old Testament?'  On page 87 of the Big Book I recalled, "Be quick to see where religious people are right. Make use of what they offer." Still, I have something for everyone here.  Perhaps one of these will work for you:

“Be still and know I am your HP.”
or  
“Be still and know I am here.”

I did things a little differently this time.  After reading the initial koan, at intervals between 2 and three minutes during the meditation time, I shortened the koan by one word.

Be still and know I am
(meditate)
Be still and know I
(meditate)
Be still and know
(meditate)
Be still and
(meditate)
Be still
(meditate)
Be
(meditate)


During the discussion time, one person thought of this as a mantra, to be repeated over and over again while soaking in each line and its offering. A wonderful term came about that fits this situation perfectly – spiritual dropping off place.

I viewed this koan as really seven koans.  Often with koans and interviews with my teachers, within the story they would single out other phrases for me to sit with.  As with Joshu and the dog koan, Mu (or No), my teacher would ask, “How long is mu? How wide is Mu. What color is Mu, etc.?

This is what I was presenting to the group, seven koans, each presenting a mysterious open ended-ness. It was how I sat with it all. The open ended-ness is the spiritual dropping off place. Coupled with Step 11, it became a place where my conscious contact with my HP grew closer and stronger, almost as if something was leading me along.

Be still and know I am

·      DH recalled there is a Hebrew word or phrase that means, “I am that I am.”

·      Step 11 implies that our HP is always approachable and near at hand…nearby.

Be still and know I

·      I went back and forth with the “I” here. Of course it’s the “I” of the universe telling me something.  It’s also me, myself, and I.  Through practicing the 12 Steps over all these years, I trust that my HP is here for me.

Be still and know

·      Know that Step 11 works; it produces good results. I know this from my experience.

Be still and

·      Take in all the possibilities and mystery in this dropping off place.

Be still

·      DH will ask his sponsee, “What do you need to do when you’re upset?” The Big Book is clear about this, too.  We pause, we take it easy, we go somewhere and be still.  This is why meditation is so important for us. It’s a place where emotions are quieted. “Where I can find my wisdom mind and the tools of the program,” DH added.

A bee being

Be

·      I am that I am.  Be the person your HP wants you to be. EA said, “Be free to learn about your Divine Creator.”  Be open and available.  In other words, be attentive to what is happening right now.




Use this mantra. Use these koans. Use both. Are you awake to Step 11?



Bill K.