Saturday, December 13, 2014

What is my worth?

A glob of gum or a heart?
Step 12: Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to [others], and practice these principles in all our affairs. 

Koan:  What is my worth?

Just think about asking yourself this question when you were at Step One.  I for one would not have given myself much worth back then. Low self esteem …low self worth…I did not measure up to others.

What handicap?
Then we work the 12 Steps… With each Step a building upon of ”estimable acts” as some say.  Something miraculous happens along this path.  We are transformed into a different person. I am not the same person that began my 12 Step journey 28 years ago.

We think of worth as value.  After working Step 12, have I become more valuable to others?  More valuable to society?  More valuable to myself?  How do I do this?

I'm an outdoor cat
By carrying the message of the Steps to others… By practicing these principles in all my affairs. 

The origin of the word “worth” is interesting:

·      Old English – weorthan
·      Old High German – werdan … to become
·      Latin – vertere … to turn

For something to become valuable, it has to be compared with something of less value.  From our beginnings at Step One, compare that with completing the 12 Steps; another way then, of describing this koan, might be What have I become?

Ain't life grand?
What have I become after having had a spiritual awakening?  There are myriad examples in the Big Book:

·      More and more we became interested in seeing what we could contribute to life. P.63
·      We come to rely upon it [inspiration]. P.87
·      …spiritually fit, we can do all sorts of things alcoholics are not supposed to do. P. 100

Responses yesterday to this koan came in various ways.  If you do these Steps, it’s worth it!  Setting a good example equals worth.  A bookkeeper brought up the notion of assets and liabilities showing net worth.  When we give, we receive more (worth)… freely giving of our self, gives us a sense of worth.

What a great place to be!

Bill K.

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