Saturday, May 14, 2016

Step 5:  Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

Koan:  The moon is bright, the water is pure, the autumn sky is clear; Is there a single cloud which stains this vast clarity?

Poem: Case 32, Transmitting the Light

It’s another “admitted” Step (like Step One).   Admitting is another recognition of powerlessness and because of this, I’m actively building upon my relationship with my Higher Power.

Whatever amount of trust, it only takes a smidge. Sitting with my inventory, I have two choices:  Do I hold back and hide certain parts, not telling my sponsor everything?  Or do I again surrender, this time to a brightness that’s present in Step Five (although we can't see this yet)?

Here we have a koan that’s painting a beautiful picture, one we've all seen.  Step 5 is laying down a foundation for building our lives.  We can’t see it yet, much less experience how our life will be.  It certainly doesn’t feel beautiful, carrying around our undisclosed Fourth Step material.  In our discussion, Daniel exclaimed, “I’m the stain!”

Is there a single cloud which stains this vast clarity of completing Step Five? The dedicated old timers will tell you their lives are as beautiful as this koan.

When working the Steps with my sponsor, this was the first Step where I felt a relief.  I no longer had to carry my burden alone.  A weight was lifted.

 Bill K.

NOTE:  Regarding the comment from Antlion below, please see my 5/22 posting: "Retreating Resentments -- My 12 & Zen in Action" commentary.

1 comment:

  1. I bought your book, but seeing the different versions of the TWELVE STEPS, I donated it to Goodwill. I have been in the Program, since 1981. It's curious that only the Buddhists deem it necessary to always offer different versions of the twelve steps, some sects actually rewriting them. Why don't y'all rewrite the ten commandments, but that won't happen, will it? Your book STINKS of ZEN. To put it plainly, you are shitting down our backs, and calling it chocolate pudding! You are confusing a simple thing.